Category: Attitude

Get Out of Your Head

We have a story that is always playing in our mind. It is like a theatrical play, but it is real. It is our life. When we are thinking, we are creating that story. We fill in the blanks between what we see, hear, taste, feel, and smell with our thoughts.

If we are only listening to our own story, then we are not able to understand fully what is happening around us. Because all those people in the same room as you, they have a story as well. We have to force ourselves out of our own story and into the moment. When we grasp their story, we see a different perspective.

We can relate someone else’s story to our own. We can connect. Before you shift the story back to your perspective, think about the possibilities for collaboration. Take time to truly listen.

When we work in a group, we want to have the answers. But it is more powerful when we can help others find their own answers. What may be right for us, is not always right for someone else. When we step out of our head and connect, we usually find a better solution. When we listen, we build influence. Only when we have influence, will people truly listen to our ideas. Then true collaboration can begin. Today, take a moment to get out of your head.

What Is Right?

I had an argument with an individual last week. The argument was not important, but it struck me afterwards that his position was, “I am just doing what I think is right!” This comment could be perfectly fine if we are able to listen to opposing views and discuss possible differences in opinion. But when we decide we no longer care what others think, and consider our opinion right without listening… well that leads to conflict.

Major conflicts throughout history were the result of people doing what they thought was right. Family arguments result when people do what they think is right without considering how it impacts others.

I have written a lot about the importance of knowing yourself and knowing your values. It is your guide to living a life of significance. I have also written a lot about the skill of listening. If you care about others you will listen to them. These two things, knowing your values and listening, are not meant to be segregated.

After the argument, I also reflected on multiple occasions in the work environment where people believe they are right and stop listening. This brings to a quick halt the opportunities for improvement, innovation, and change.

The lesson I reflected on this week is that even when you feel you are right, you have to consider the possibility that you are not. Stop and listen. How good are you at temporarily putting aside your opinion, and actively listening?

Overcome Your Fear

Our greatest accomplishments are often linked to instances when we are able to overcome fear. Fear is a barrier that keeps us from being the best version of ourselves. It is the fear of failure that usually keeps us from taking action.

A quote by Ambrose Redmoon says, “Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgment that something else is more important than fear.” This quote reminds me that it is easier to overcome fear when we are fueled by desire. A desire to achieve something that is important to us.

Fear is not eliminated. We just find we are able to temporarily ignore it. Just enough to act.

“There is only one thing that makes a dream impossible to achieve: the fear of failure,” said Paulo Coelho.

Fear can also feel like uncertainty. We hesitate, or we miss an opportunity because we are uncertain. I have a friend that is always saying, “Know your plan. Work your plan.” The work becomes taking action even when you feel stuck by adjusting.

Where do you need to adjust your perspective to overcome fear?

This Too Will Pass

Nothing in life lasts forever, and with time, all things change. Do you feel like your life is in an unhappy state? Are you stuck in a rut? It will pass! Sadly, this also applies to the good times as well. All will fade with time.

We should have plans and goals, but we can be assured that life rarely follows the best laid plans. Learning to face the ups and downs with a positive attitude can help smooth our path. Today’s challenges will only be history tomorrow.

We can’t control all the factors that affect us each day, so what can we control? We can learn to maximize the sweet times and minimize the sour ones.