Author: Mark S. Brown

It has been said that you become the average of the five people you spend the most time with. I believe it. It is easy to see when you look at a couple that has been happily married for a long time. They have melded and become similar.

So, who do you spend your time with? Who is it you are becoming? Maybe it is time to look at your environment. Here are a few questions to ponder:

1. What are the strengths of the people I have surrounded myself with? Do they complement me, and help me grow? Or do we share similar strengths?

2. What are they learning? Or are they learning? You will grow more when you are around other people that are also growing.

3. What do they know and what have they done that I can learn from? Is it aligned with what you want to learn?

4. From their perspective, why do they spend time with me? Am I providing a mutually beneficial relationship?

King Solomon of Israel wrote, “Walk with the wise and become wise, for a companion of fools suffers harm.” Are you walking with the wise?

 

Mother Teresa observed, “Yesterday is gone. Tomorrow has not yet come. We have only today. Let us begin.” And so it is when we decide to make a new resolution. You have to start today.

Why do people make resolutions for a New Year when they are not going to change? Many hope to change, but lack the discipline or willpower to achieve the change.

Life long goals are not achieved without making yearly goals. But yearly goals are not achieved without daily action. Only disciplined daily action can turn into habits. We truely change when we are successful in changing our habits.

How long does it take to form a habit? About three weeks. So for your New Year’s resolutions this coming year, focus on having enough willpower for three weeks. If you can achieve to stay consistent for three weeks, it will get easier.

Most people can’t last the three weeks, but I know you can do it.

James Levin once observed, “Follow effective action with quiet reflection. From the quiet reflection will come even more effective action.” Quiet reflection is a process I know works. I also know that the more you practice it, the more effective it becomes. The hard part is the discipline to consistently practice it.

We are all so busy. The end of the day comes so quickly, and there are always more things on the to do list than minutes available. So how can we stop doing, and sit still to think?

Leaders are always prone to action. We like to make things happen. We accept mistakes, we just want someone to do something.

As we near the end of 2012, and prepare for 2013, it is a natural time for all of us to reflect and think about how we will improve in the new year. Start blocking some time in your calendar now for the end of year reflection. You want to achieve a lot in 2013, so spend some time thinking about it.

On your list of objectives, add daily reflection. Get it in your 2013 calendar now. If there is only one objective you stick with in the next year, this should be it. This objective can impact everything else you do. Create the habit.

 

Captain D. Michael Abrashoff said, “If all you give are orders, then all you’ll get are order-takers.” Leaders give power to those they lead, and then hold them accountable for using that power appropriately.

Empowering your people will help them grow. Empowering your people will also help you grow in many ways. You will grow your leadership. you will grow your influence, you will grow your ability to achieve your personal goals.

There is no reason not to teach, coach, and empower others. But it is easy to overlook the benefit when you focus on results, instead of focusing on process. Challenge yourself to challenge others.

Abraham Lincoln said, “My great concern is not whether you have failed, but whether you are content with your failure.”